My question involves landlord-tenant law in the State of Wisconsin:
I moved into a Section 42 building with a Craigslist roommate who already lived there in January and signed a joint lease through August. In May we received info about renewing the lease, and out of nowhere my roommate said via text she wanted me to move out. I kept trying to get her to sit down and have a face-to-face conversation about whatever her problems were, but she always had a reason why she couldn't, even when we'd scheduled it. I was at a loss for how to deal with the situation when she wouldn't talk to me, provided her grievances out of nowhere via text, and said she had other possible roommates lined up. Since she wouldn't talk to me, I told her directly in a text that I was not moving out and had just as much right to stay as she did. She tends not to be on top of things, so I basically made the renewal happen myself.
Some details:
- I am physically disabled and chronically ill, so I have to prioritize tasks in my life. Basic things like emptying the dishwasher can be extremely difficult. Moving and unpacking are particularly hard, and I have to rely on friends to even move boxes around the apartment. Because of this prioritization, I talk to roommates about what's important to them and prioritize partly based on that.
- When I moved in, I repeatedly asked her to have a conversation about our expectations and boundaries and maybe sign a roommate agreement. She said that was a good idea, then repeatedly blew it off. I asked direct questions about whether certain things were a problem, and she'd be very blase, saying, "Oh no, that's all right." I specifically asked if the boxes I'd left piled in the dinette were a problem because she never came out of her room, and she gave me all kinds of other reasons why she stayed in there. So I prioritized my work and healing from various injuries incurred from the move. I didn't like not being unpacked, but I have to make hard choices.
- She did ask me twice to deal with the boxes because she was having people over, but she did so last minute (one or two days before), which is not workable for my physical limitations as I'd told her, and she sounded very blase about it. Like "It would be nice if you could do this." I'd try to arrange help from a friend, but they can't just drop everything either. I'm an assertive person, and I read her requests as not that important because she was so passive about it. I also expressed my needs in what I felt was an assertive but polite tone. Almost all of our communication was via text, which is not good, but since I never really saw her and she'd avoid requests for conversations, there wasn't much else I could do.
- Because of the above, I was completely shocked when she said she wanted me out, and her basis for thinking I should be the one to move was that she was there first. Her complaints were:
1) The boxes. (Completely reasonable, but she hadn't said much about it previously.)
2) "Lifestyle differences." I'm not sure what she means by this since she avoids conversations. Some differences I'm aware of: she smokes pot, which she sprung on me after we'd signed the lease. I don't care if people choose to do so generally, but it is grounds for eviction in our lease, future ineligibility for federal housing, and irritates my asthma, so I asked her not to do so in the apartment. Other things that have come up include my preference to use the dishwasher instead of hand washing, my request that perishable garbage be placed IN the can (one example of this problem: she left the bloody packaging for a steak on top of the can when it was getting a little full), and not leaving perishable remnants of food sitting in her room (I saw quite the collection when I had to chase my cat out). I'm messy in my room, but I prefer things reasonably sanitary. All kinds of problems she had with the way I do things came out suddenly when she told me she wanted me out, but apparently from her perspective my requests are nitpicky and unreasonable while hers are valid. No two-way street.
3) My cat's voracious appetite. She goes after carbs as well as meat and dairy like other cats, and I told my roommate this when we first met. She said it shouldn't be a problem and we agreed that it was handy that we had a pantry to put those things in. Now she claims it's too onerous to make sure the food in her room is put away in the kitchen or even out of kitty reach, so she keeps her door closed at all times, preventing her cat from coming and going.
4) I have complained about her paying her rent late or paying less than she owed. (We pay online through separate logins, but we can see all of the account activity.) She has done this more times than not, and I have been able to look back at the ledger since she moved in, and this is a very consistent pattern. This is NOT a lifestyle difference. It is a failure to comply with the lease, and I worry about how it may affect my standing.
All kinds of other unusual things have come up since she sprung this on me. When I reminded her that I told her about my cat's food behaviors and my health issues when we met, she claimed her former roommate chose me, not her. My understanding was that while the former roommate was screening the emails because my now roommate was working long, grueling shifts, that when we met we were deciding whether we were a good fit. Indeed, we spent several hours talking, discussing our and our cats' habits, and just generally getting to know each other. And at the end I asked if she wanted to be roommates, and she said definitely. So I have no idea where she got this notion that she had no choice in roommates.
The list of weird and seemingly passive aggressive things goes on. In one case after I had finally finished unpacking the boxes and organized neatly some of the things in small sets of drawers in the dinette (with a few items on top that still needed homes), I came home at 11:00PM to find she'd put ALL of it (including furniture) in the middle of my bedroom such that I couldn't even get to my bed. I had to quickly call my friend who'd dropped me off to ask his help since I was physically incapable of moving some of it. And of course I can't discuss how she'd like things set up because she doesn't talk to me.
Things have settled down recently. She said she was going to talk to a friend at our local Tenant Resource Center, and I'm wondering if they told her there's nothing she can do. But I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. If it does, I'd like to know my legal rights. It's a bad situation, and I know some would advise that I move out. But I have moved twice in a year and a half, which is very damaging to my body. Yet another move would cause more setbacks, limiting my ability to work and work on my recovery. It would disrupt my current health situation that's requiring a great deal of testing and other appointments. Additionally, it's a handicapped accessible building with underground parking (in winter I struggle physically to clear snow and in summer the heat has a detrimental effect on my health), and these things are nigh impossible to find. So I am digging in and not leaving. And I feel that if she has a problem, she should move out.
Sorry for the long post. It's such a complicated situation I wasn't sure how to boil it down.
Any advice? 1) Is there anything she can do to try to force me out? 2) Does living here first give her a greater claim? And if so, can I fight back with the clear evidence that she is chronically late with her rent and violates the lease with the unsanitary conditions and (also a violation of federal housing laws) with the pot smoking? (For the latter I do have a corroborating witness, as a friend was here when she was smoking.) 3) And can her chronic lateness with the rent and/or the pot smoking affect me under joint severability/liability?
Thank you!
I moved into a Section 42 building with a Craigslist roommate who already lived there in January and signed a joint lease through August. In May we received info about renewing the lease, and out of nowhere my roommate said via text she wanted me to move out. I kept trying to get her to sit down and have a face-to-face conversation about whatever her problems were, but she always had a reason why she couldn't, even when we'd scheduled it. I was at a loss for how to deal with the situation when she wouldn't talk to me, provided her grievances out of nowhere via text, and said she had other possible roommates lined up. Since she wouldn't talk to me, I told her directly in a text that I was not moving out and had just as much right to stay as she did. She tends not to be on top of things, so I basically made the renewal happen myself.
Some details:
- I am physically disabled and chronically ill, so I have to prioritize tasks in my life. Basic things like emptying the dishwasher can be extremely difficult. Moving and unpacking are particularly hard, and I have to rely on friends to even move boxes around the apartment. Because of this prioritization, I talk to roommates about what's important to them and prioritize partly based on that.
- When I moved in, I repeatedly asked her to have a conversation about our expectations and boundaries and maybe sign a roommate agreement. She said that was a good idea, then repeatedly blew it off. I asked direct questions about whether certain things were a problem, and she'd be very blase, saying, "Oh no, that's all right." I specifically asked if the boxes I'd left piled in the dinette were a problem because she never came out of her room, and she gave me all kinds of other reasons why she stayed in there. So I prioritized my work and healing from various injuries incurred from the move. I didn't like not being unpacked, but I have to make hard choices.
- She did ask me twice to deal with the boxes because she was having people over, but she did so last minute (one or two days before), which is not workable for my physical limitations as I'd told her, and she sounded very blase about it. Like "It would be nice if you could do this." I'd try to arrange help from a friend, but they can't just drop everything either. I'm an assertive person, and I read her requests as not that important because she was so passive about it. I also expressed my needs in what I felt was an assertive but polite tone. Almost all of our communication was via text, which is not good, but since I never really saw her and she'd avoid requests for conversations, there wasn't much else I could do.
- Because of the above, I was completely shocked when she said she wanted me out, and her basis for thinking I should be the one to move was that she was there first. Her complaints were:
1) The boxes. (Completely reasonable, but she hadn't said much about it previously.)
2) "Lifestyle differences." I'm not sure what she means by this since she avoids conversations. Some differences I'm aware of: she smokes pot, which she sprung on me after we'd signed the lease. I don't care if people choose to do so generally, but it is grounds for eviction in our lease, future ineligibility for federal housing, and irritates my asthma, so I asked her not to do so in the apartment. Other things that have come up include my preference to use the dishwasher instead of hand washing, my request that perishable garbage be placed IN the can (one example of this problem: she left the bloody packaging for a steak on top of the can when it was getting a little full), and not leaving perishable remnants of food sitting in her room (I saw quite the collection when I had to chase my cat out). I'm messy in my room, but I prefer things reasonably sanitary. All kinds of problems she had with the way I do things came out suddenly when she told me she wanted me out, but apparently from her perspective my requests are nitpicky and unreasonable while hers are valid. No two-way street.
3) My cat's voracious appetite. She goes after carbs as well as meat and dairy like other cats, and I told my roommate this when we first met. She said it shouldn't be a problem and we agreed that it was handy that we had a pantry to put those things in. Now she claims it's too onerous to make sure the food in her room is put away in the kitchen or even out of kitty reach, so she keeps her door closed at all times, preventing her cat from coming and going.
4) I have complained about her paying her rent late or paying less than she owed. (We pay online through separate logins, but we can see all of the account activity.) She has done this more times than not, and I have been able to look back at the ledger since she moved in, and this is a very consistent pattern. This is NOT a lifestyle difference. It is a failure to comply with the lease, and I worry about how it may affect my standing.
All kinds of other unusual things have come up since she sprung this on me. When I reminded her that I told her about my cat's food behaviors and my health issues when we met, she claimed her former roommate chose me, not her. My understanding was that while the former roommate was screening the emails because my now roommate was working long, grueling shifts, that when we met we were deciding whether we were a good fit. Indeed, we spent several hours talking, discussing our and our cats' habits, and just generally getting to know each other. And at the end I asked if she wanted to be roommates, and she said definitely. So I have no idea where she got this notion that she had no choice in roommates.
The list of weird and seemingly passive aggressive things goes on. In one case after I had finally finished unpacking the boxes and organized neatly some of the things in small sets of drawers in the dinette (with a few items on top that still needed homes), I came home at 11:00PM to find she'd put ALL of it (including furniture) in the middle of my bedroom such that I couldn't even get to my bed. I had to quickly call my friend who'd dropped me off to ask his help since I was physically incapable of moving some of it. And of course I can't discuss how she'd like things set up because she doesn't talk to me.
Things have settled down recently. She said she was going to talk to a friend at our local Tenant Resource Center, and I'm wondering if they told her there's nothing she can do. But I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. If it does, I'd like to know my legal rights. It's a bad situation, and I know some would advise that I move out. But I have moved twice in a year and a half, which is very damaging to my body. Yet another move would cause more setbacks, limiting my ability to work and work on my recovery. It would disrupt my current health situation that's requiring a great deal of testing and other appointments. Additionally, it's a handicapped accessible building with underground parking (in winter I struggle physically to clear snow and in summer the heat has a detrimental effect on my health), and these things are nigh impossible to find. So I am digging in and not leaving. And I feel that if she has a problem, she should move out.
Sorry for the long post. It's such a complicated situation I wasn't sure how to boil it down.
Any advice? 1) Is there anything she can do to try to force me out? 2) Does living here first give her a greater claim? And if so, can I fight back with the clear evidence that she is chronically late with her rent and violates the lease with the unsanitary conditions and (also a violation of federal housing laws) with the pot smoking? (For the latter I do have a corroborating witness, as a friend was here when she was smoking.) 3) And can her chronic lateness with the rent and/or the pot smoking affect me under joint severability/liability?
Thank you!
Roommates: Roommate Trying to Kick Me Out with a Joint Lease and Won't Talk to Me
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