My question involves a child custody case from the State of: TX
Since this site has been helpful so far with real people answering, I thought I'd ask here about people's interactions with social studies / custody evaluations. Once our court order is signed, we will pay our evaluator and she will begin her job.
There's plenty of info on the internet about how to prepare and what to expect. And I even participated in one as a reference for our old neighbor back when TX called them social studies. I should know how they work. Their attorney even emailed me a 104 page report about them that was the complete study of my neighbor's so I can print it for them. My attorney doesn't even know who that lady was, said only 2 people around here do them, and it doesn't work like that.
When given the name of the lady conducting the evaluation, I only found 2 things about them, both were complaints, mainly because they didn't get what they wanted I'm sure; however, both complaints were consistent in saying that she is biased and does not do any research, ignores mental health issues, and writes unfavorable lies.
I am not perfect, but as a person, I am a good honest person who genuinely loves his kids, and the only thing I want in life are my kids - to make have a fair deal with my ex like we previously had before her mother stepped in and hired an attorney because she didn't like our arrangements. I have a great relationship with my kids, I KNOW my daughter would prefer more time with me, my son is too young to speak but we have a great bond too. But there are tons of things against my ex. It would take me 2 solid days of typing to explain. The biggest things being that she is alienating the kids from me by replacing my daughter's tablet and instructed her that she must keep daddy blocked; and she is using lies to gain leverage. Those lies being the reason why we (my attorney & I) decided a custody evaluation was best.
However, though I know the truth will prevail, it seems the good guy always gets the shaft. So I can't help to worry what is going to happen. My house if on the small side, but my daughter actually picked it out for me (long story) and loves it there, in fact, due to being in the country, it seems everyone loves it. It doesn't look that great on the outside, but it's clean and organized on the inside, big clean yard. I have cabinet locks and the whole 9 yards for the toddler (though don't really need all those precautions as he is much more behaved at my house than with mama) - But I don't have much, like my dining room table is a card table. I gave everything up when me and my ex separated 3 years ago then I moved in to her apartment, so I had to completely start over. It's a 2 bedroom, and if asked about sleeping arrangements when the kids are older, I won't have an answer; however my ex has a 2 bedroom apartment living the same way, where son has a crib in our bedroom. What should matter is that it is kid friendly, the bond that I have with both showing that I am a good dad.
Everyone is different, with different circumstances, and every evaluator is also different. My question isn't exactly "what should I expect" But more like has anyone had a bad experience? What things did they actually care about despite what their real job is to do? What references do they check (if any) or ask for any references on your behalf? Did they ignore anything that really needed attention? What should I really watch out for?
Since this site has been helpful so far with real people answering, I thought I'd ask here about people's interactions with social studies / custody evaluations. Once our court order is signed, we will pay our evaluator and she will begin her job.
There's plenty of info on the internet about how to prepare and what to expect. And I even participated in one as a reference for our old neighbor back when TX called them social studies. I should know how they work. Their attorney even emailed me a 104 page report about them that was the complete study of my neighbor's so I can print it for them. My attorney doesn't even know who that lady was, said only 2 people around here do them, and it doesn't work like that.
When given the name of the lady conducting the evaluation, I only found 2 things about them, both were complaints, mainly because they didn't get what they wanted I'm sure; however, both complaints were consistent in saying that she is biased and does not do any research, ignores mental health issues, and writes unfavorable lies.
I am not perfect, but as a person, I am a good honest person who genuinely loves his kids, and the only thing I want in life are my kids - to make have a fair deal with my ex like we previously had before her mother stepped in and hired an attorney because she didn't like our arrangements. I have a great relationship with my kids, I KNOW my daughter would prefer more time with me, my son is too young to speak but we have a great bond too. But there are tons of things against my ex. It would take me 2 solid days of typing to explain. The biggest things being that she is alienating the kids from me by replacing my daughter's tablet and instructed her that she must keep daddy blocked; and she is using lies to gain leverage. Those lies being the reason why we (my attorney & I) decided a custody evaluation was best.
However, though I know the truth will prevail, it seems the good guy always gets the shaft. So I can't help to worry what is going to happen. My house if on the small side, but my daughter actually picked it out for me (long story) and loves it there, in fact, due to being in the country, it seems everyone loves it. It doesn't look that great on the outside, but it's clean and organized on the inside, big clean yard. I have cabinet locks and the whole 9 yards for the toddler (though don't really need all those precautions as he is much more behaved at my house than with mama) - But I don't have much, like my dining room table is a card table. I gave everything up when me and my ex separated 3 years ago then I moved in to her apartment, so I had to completely start over. It's a 2 bedroom, and if asked about sleeping arrangements when the kids are older, I won't have an answer; however my ex has a 2 bedroom apartment living the same way, where son has a crib in our bedroom. What should matter is that it is kid friendly, the bond that I have with both showing that I am a good dad.
Everyone is different, with different circumstances, and every evaluator is also different. My question isn't exactly "what should I expect" But more like has anyone had a bad experience? What things did they actually care about despite what their real job is to do? What references do they check (if any) or ask for any references on your behalf? Did they ignore anything that really needed attention? What should I really watch out for?
Custody and Visitation Issues: What Do Custody Evaluators Do in the Evaluation and Preparation of Their Reports
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