My question involves a child custody case from the State of: TN
Hello!
I have previous threads if you would like to review.
My son’s father and I have come to an agreement with no hearing of 50/50 time, shared decisions, and no support. I am continuing to homeschool, so the actual time is more in my favor since my son is with me for some of dad’s “time.” We have been exercising this plan for about 5 months and I have some serious concerns and would like your thoughts on what I can or should do about them.
The first thing is the amount of time that my son is left to himself to play video games or watch Youtube videos – basically every waking minute, and sometimes late into the night/early morning. I have discussed this with dad (who also spends every waking minute on video games) many times and shared scientific research articles about the brain damage that occurs in children who play too much- which he takes offense to... However, he agreed to limit time to two hours a day which is still too much according to the scientists, but he doesn’t actually do it. I have tried to teach my son to make healthier choices, and that playing video games for a long time is bad for his brain, but he’s 8! He can’t be expected to parent himself.
The second thing is that all of this time on the computer is not at all supervised. My son has been exposed to pornography on several occasions. I have parental software on his laptop, but he has an X-Box at dads that he uses for the “things he can’t do on the computer” – his words. I have mentioned this to dad and gotten no response, and the situation has not been corrected.
The third thing is that my son tells me that his dad yells at him a lot, and the things he’s getting in trouble for are tiny things that most people wouldn’t even care about. He is very afraid of his father yet he still wants to go to his house because he gets to play video games all day long. My son has told me that if he couldn’t play video games at his dad’s house, he wouldn’t want to go there at all!
As part of homeschool I teach my son about character and doing to right thing… many times dad comes up in these conversations. My son is beginning to realize that his dad is not a good person… awkward conversations for me because I can’t tell my son that his dad is a bad parent, I am left to try to teach my son how to cope with a situation that he shouldn’t have to. I have taken to sending a lot of homework with my son to his dad’s house… he is left to manage his time completely on his own and it doesn’t really get done, but I can’t talk to dad about that because I’m afraid of how he’ll treat my son for not doing it.
So you have any thoughts on this situation? I’ve been overly nice to dad, but I believe that my son is being harmed far more by dad’s parenting decisions than he would be by our not having an amicable relationship…
Hello!
I have previous threads if you would like to review.
My son’s father and I have come to an agreement with no hearing of 50/50 time, shared decisions, and no support. I am continuing to homeschool, so the actual time is more in my favor since my son is with me for some of dad’s “time.” We have been exercising this plan for about 5 months and I have some serious concerns and would like your thoughts on what I can or should do about them.
The first thing is the amount of time that my son is left to himself to play video games or watch Youtube videos – basically every waking minute, and sometimes late into the night/early morning. I have discussed this with dad (who also spends every waking minute on video games) many times and shared scientific research articles about the brain damage that occurs in children who play too much- which he takes offense to... However, he agreed to limit time to two hours a day which is still too much according to the scientists, but he doesn’t actually do it. I have tried to teach my son to make healthier choices, and that playing video games for a long time is bad for his brain, but he’s 8! He can’t be expected to parent himself.
The second thing is that all of this time on the computer is not at all supervised. My son has been exposed to pornography on several occasions. I have parental software on his laptop, but he has an X-Box at dads that he uses for the “things he can’t do on the computer” – his words. I have mentioned this to dad and gotten no response, and the situation has not been corrected.
The third thing is that my son tells me that his dad yells at him a lot, and the things he’s getting in trouble for are tiny things that most people wouldn’t even care about. He is very afraid of his father yet he still wants to go to his house because he gets to play video games all day long. My son has told me that if he couldn’t play video games at his dad’s house, he wouldn’t want to go there at all!
As part of homeschool I teach my son about character and doing to right thing… many times dad comes up in these conversations. My son is beginning to realize that his dad is not a good person… awkward conversations for me because I can’t tell my son that his dad is a bad parent, I am left to try to teach my son how to cope with a situation that he shouldn’t have to. I have taken to sending a lot of homework with my son to his dad’s house… he is left to manage his time completely on his own and it doesn’t really get done, but I can’t talk to dad about that because I’m afraid of how he’ll treat my son for not doing it.
So you have any thoughts on this situation? I’ve been overly nice to dad, but I believe that my son is being harmed far more by dad’s parenting decisions than he would be by our not having an amicable relationship…
Custody and Visitation Issues: Co-Parenting Issues
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