My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Texas - in the city of San Antonio - regarding locating paternal father and establishing paternity and support from the father who is residing in Dallas Texas
Hi all,
I am looking for advice from single parents who were in a similar situation as mine (read below) and what they did to resolve their issue. I am also looking for advice from someone with knowledge on family law legal issues or anyone who can help me or point me in the right direction to get some help (maybe a non profit who helps with this kind of thing).
The San Antonio child support office will not give me court related documents to my case so that I can hire a private process server. This is despite the fact that both the father and I both have our names on the court documents and we are both ordered to appear in court each time.
1. Is this typical?
2. How can I get the child support office to give me these papers?
The reason:
I need these court papers so I can hire a private process server to serve the father. It has been multiple years now trying to get the father served and the court appointed process servers are not getting the job done. Our last court date was earlier this month. I am not sure when the next court date will be set up but usually its every 3 – 6 months. Often I am not even notified of the next court date. Sometimes I am only notified a week or two before. It is a guessing game. A reasonable amount of time is needed for the private process server to make their attempts.
The situation/circumstances
My son's father is a deadbeat dad who is actively avoiding being served court papers to establish paternity and child support. He just doesn't answer the door when the court appointed process server knocks on the door. He is not stupid. The father lives in Dallas, I live in San Antonio. I used to live in Dallas. The father knows and has known about his 7 year old son since he was born. The father has not so much as called once in 7 years to check on my son. I also have the father's mother's phone number and address in Dallas. When I try to contact her its hard to get a hold of her. When I eventually do, I make small talk and eventually ask her about her son's whereabouts but she gets dismissive and claims she doesn't know. This was even when my son's father and his mother's address were both at the same apartment complex (different apartment number) and even though she knows that her son has a child. I offer to send her pictures of my son and she says she would like that but I never hear from her again. She is basically covering for her son (my son's father).
I have had many court dates now in which I was present but the father was not. Many attempts have been made over the years to serve the father. All have been unsuccessful. I have raised and supported my son by myself for all these years now. I have fallen on hard times and I need the assistance and financial support of the father.
I spoke to a private investigator in Dallas who was very frank and honest with me. He told me that court appointed process servers (those who are appointed to serve legal papers) have no real incentive to serve the papers. He stated things such as, they get paid whether they serve or do not serve. Many do not even try if they do not see a car in the driveway. They don't write down details such as license plates etc. to be researched and used at a later time for better success. He said, these would be things a private process server would do (or not do) different then a court appointed one to increase the chances of a successful serve. He told me I am better off paying for a private process server since this is their job and their reputation is on the line. He said I am free to choose the process server I want and that going with a private process server is much better than the typical court appointed one. He said, if the private process server is unsuccessful, we can then go the much more expensive "sweat out the father for hours at his residence" - private investigation method with personal surveillance. He recommended going the cheaper private process server route first then go with something more extensive and expensive later if need be.
As I stated earlier, the problem is the San Antonio child support office will not give me the court papers so that I can fax them to a major Dallas private process server. I have not picked one out yet. I again went to the child support office today and they wouldn't give me the court papers. They told me they couldn't even give me the father’s information. This is despite the fact that I am the one who already has this information because I spent $250 with a private investigator for a skip trace to present the child support office with more of the fathers information. They have not served the father with this new information as evident by the no show of the father on our last court date. They do say that attempts have been made but have been unsucessful. While I knew a good amount of information of the father, I needed a skip trace to locate him. As I said earlier, the father is not stupid and is actively running/avoiding being served. I have all of the fathers information (like social, car driven, address etc.). They are being very tight lipped and unsupportive. The child support office said I had to hire an attorney to get this information. This doesn't make sense to me since I am the one who gave the child support office this information and I am the one who is on the court papers.
If this continues at this rate, the father will never be served. It is 7 going on 8 years now.
3. Should the San Antonio child support office give me the court papers so that I can fax them to a major Dallas process server to get the father served?
4. Do I have to hire and an expensive attorney at this point?
5. Are there any non profits (or somewhere else I can go) that can help me at this point?
A little more
I do not have the money for an expensive attorney. I have hit financially hard times. I make $1 over minimum wage and my boss cut all employees hours at my job to around 20-35 hours per week.
An attorney is an expensive middle man for something either the state will do for free (I usually have appointed attorneys when I go) or something I can do myself if they would just give me the papers. Hiring an attorney will be an expensive retainer fee (usually $1,000 upfront) and usually and expensive hourly fee ($100 - $200 per hour). This will be on top of still having to hire a private process server and possibly a private investigator to literally wait/sweat the father out to learn his schedule to get him served either at work or when going to his vehicle. I could not make this upfront retainer fee. I also could not make the monthly payments regardless of how small. I sometimes have trouble keeping food on the table for my children as it is. Again, this is something that can be done by myself with the proper paperwork. I prefer to keep a very expensive middle man out of it. I am not sure what I should do. I am stuck.
Any advice would help and would be much appreciated.
Hi all,
I am looking for advice from single parents who were in a similar situation as mine (read below) and what they did to resolve their issue. I am also looking for advice from someone with knowledge on family law legal issues or anyone who can help me or point me in the right direction to get some help (maybe a non profit who helps with this kind of thing).
The San Antonio child support office will not give me court related documents to my case so that I can hire a private process server. This is despite the fact that both the father and I both have our names on the court documents and we are both ordered to appear in court each time.
1. Is this typical?
2. How can I get the child support office to give me these papers?
The reason:
I need these court papers so I can hire a private process server to serve the father. It has been multiple years now trying to get the father served and the court appointed process servers are not getting the job done. Our last court date was earlier this month. I am not sure when the next court date will be set up but usually its every 3 – 6 months. Often I am not even notified of the next court date. Sometimes I am only notified a week or two before. It is a guessing game. A reasonable amount of time is needed for the private process server to make their attempts.
The situation/circumstances
My son's father is a deadbeat dad who is actively avoiding being served court papers to establish paternity and child support. He just doesn't answer the door when the court appointed process server knocks on the door. He is not stupid. The father lives in Dallas, I live in San Antonio. I used to live in Dallas. The father knows and has known about his 7 year old son since he was born. The father has not so much as called once in 7 years to check on my son. I also have the father's mother's phone number and address in Dallas. When I try to contact her its hard to get a hold of her. When I eventually do, I make small talk and eventually ask her about her son's whereabouts but she gets dismissive and claims she doesn't know. This was even when my son's father and his mother's address were both at the same apartment complex (different apartment number) and even though she knows that her son has a child. I offer to send her pictures of my son and she says she would like that but I never hear from her again. She is basically covering for her son (my son's father).
I have had many court dates now in which I was present but the father was not. Many attempts have been made over the years to serve the father. All have been unsuccessful. I have raised and supported my son by myself for all these years now. I have fallen on hard times and I need the assistance and financial support of the father.
I spoke to a private investigator in Dallas who was very frank and honest with me. He told me that court appointed process servers (those who are appointed to serve legal papers) have no real incentive to serve the papers. He stated things such as, they get paid whether they serve or do not serve. Many do not even try if they do not see a car in the driveway. They don't write down details such as license plates etc. to be researched and used at a later time for better success. He said, these would be things a private process server would do (or not do) different then a court appointed one to increase the chances of a successful serve. He told me I am better off paying for a private process server since this is their job and their reputation is on the line. He said I am free to choose the process server I want and that going with a private process server is much better than the typical court appointed one. He said, if the private process server is unsuccessful, we can then go the much more expensive "sweat out the father for hours at his residence" - private investigation method with personal surveillance. He recommended going the cheaper private process server route first then go with something more extensive and expensive later if need be.
As I stated earlier, the problem is the San Antonio child support office will not give me the court papers so that I can fax them to a major Dallas private process server. I have not picked one out yet. I again went to the child support office today and they wouldn't give me the court papers. They told me they couldn't even give me the father’s information. This is despite the fact that I am the one who already has this information because I spent $250 with a private investigator for a skip trace to present the child support office with more of the fathers information. They have not served the father with this new information as evident by the no show of the father on our last court date. They do say that attempts have been made but have been unsucessful. While I knew a good amount of information of the father, I needed a skip trace to locate him. As I said earlier, the father is not stupid and is actively running/avoiding being served. I have all of the fathers information (like social, car driven, address etc.). They are being very tight lipped and unsupportive. The child support office said I had to hire an attorney to get this information. This doesn't make sense to me since I am the one who gave the child support office this information and I am the one who is on the court papers.
If this continues at this rate, the father will never be served. It is 7 going on 8 years now.
3. Should the San Antonio child support office give me the court papers so that I can fax them to a major Dallas process server to get the father served?
4. Do I have to hire and an expensive attorney at this point?
5. Are there any non profits (or somewhere else I can go) that can help me at this point?
A little more
I do not have the money for an expensive attorney. I have hit financially hard times. I make $1 over minimum wage and my boss cut all employees hours at my job to around 20-35 hours per week.
An attorney is an expensive middle man for something either the state will do for free (I usually have appointed attorneys when I go) or something I can do myself if they would just give me the papers. Hiring an attorney will be an expensive retainer fee (usually $1,000 upfront) and usually and expensive hourly fee ($100 - $200 per hour). This will be on top of still having to hire a private process server and possibly a private investigator to literally wait/sweat the father out to learn his schedule to get him served either at work or when going to his vehicle. I could not make this upfront retainer fee. I also could not make the monthly payments regardless of how small. I sometimes have trouble keeping food on the table for my children as it is. Again, this is something that can be done by myself with the proper paperwork. I prefer to keep a very expensive middle man out of it. I am not sure what I should do. I am stuck.
Any advice would help and would be much appreciated.
Establishing an Order: How to Get a Child Support Office to Give Your Copies of Court Papers
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