My question involves a child custody case from the State of: MO.
I finally filed for a custody modification after months of my ex threatening to take me back to court.
In the past, he willingly skipped hundreds of visits during his court-awarded time because he wanted to travel, go to bars, etc. (he wasn't working or in school) He has only attended a handful of school functions and medical appointments over the years, and one of our kids has special needs. (meaning our child had tons of appointments on a regular basis that I attended alone)
Imagine my surprise when ex showed up at the kids' open house for school a few days ago and signed up to volunteer at every single field trip and class party for all of our kids. He also contacted a medical specialist our child has seen more than 100 times and requested a meeting to discuss the child's progress. The provider thought it was odd and informed me (the provider has tried to contact ex in the past with no response).
I feel like my ex is just doing this to look good in court. He did this 7 years ago when I initially filed for custody, and then he disappeared for months after the judge gave us a 70/30 schedule (I got 70, ex got 30). After that, he only came a few times a month even though the court gave him more than 3x that in the schedule.
I recently filed to reduce ex's visitation time, but ex wants 50/50 because "that's what's fair" and "I shouldn't have to pay money for things you buy at your house." I'm quoting him here - he's talking about getting child support reduced by increasing his visitation schedule. I also filed for sole legal custody since he refused to attend so many medical/educational appointments over the years, and now he's cancelling out that claim by suddenly contacting our child's provider for a private appointment.
How do judges usually feel about parents who suddenly become super mom or super dad after something is filed? I have proof that he willingly skipped custody visits and medical/educational appointments over the years (I texted/emailed to invite him so I'd have a paper trail if we ever went back to court), but I'm not sure if it will matter. It takes a while to get a court date here, so I don't know if 3 to 6 months of him being super involved will cancel out 5+ years of him not attending anything or showing up for visits.
I finally filed for a custody modification after months of my ex threatening to take me back to court.
In the past, he willingly skipped hundreds of visits during his court-awarded time because he wanted to travel, go to bars, etc. (he wasn't working or in school) He has only attended a handful of school functions and medical appointments over the years, and one of our kids has special needs. (meaning our child had tons of appointments on a regular basis that I attended alone)
Imagine my surprise when ex showed up at the kids' open house for school a few days ago and signed up to volunteer at every single field trip and class party for all of our kids. He also contacted a medical specialist our child has seen more than 100 times and requested a meeting to discuss the child's progress. The provider thought it was odd and informed me (the provider has tried to contact ex in the past with no response).
I feel like my ex is just doing this to look good in court. He did this 7 years ago when I initially filed for custody, and then he disappeared for months after the judge gave us a 70/30 schedule (I got 70, ex got 30). After that, he only came a few times a month even though the court gave him more than 3x that in the schedule.
I recently filed to reduce ex's visitation time, but ex wants 50/50 because "that's what's fair" and "I shouldn't have to pay money for things you buy at your house." I'm quoting him here - he's talking about getting child support reduced by increasing his visitation schedule. I also filed for sole legal custody since he refused to attend so many medical/educational appointments over the years, and now he's cancelling out that claim by suddenly contacting our child's provider for a private appointment.
How do judges usually feel about parents who suddenly become super mom or super dad after something is filed? I have proof that he willingly skipped custody visits and medical/educational appointments over the years (I texted/emailed to invite him so I'd have a paper trail if we ever went back to court), but I'm not sure if it will matter. It takes a while to get a court date here, so I don't know if 3 to 6 months of him being super involved will cancel out 5+ years of him not attending anything or showing up for visits.
Modification of Custody: How Much Do Past Actions Matter in a Custody Case
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